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Why Can't This Happen in College Hockey?

(Slooooooooow news day filler. FYI)

Earlier this week, we were treated to a delightful story about two Iowa football players stealing a credit card and making tons of illegal purchases, as well as one of the funnier headlines I've seen in a while.

The key to any good news story though is the informative follow-up story. That came courtesy of The Hawkeye Compulsion, who found out that frequent Facebookers really should have seen this coming.

(Side Story 1: Despite his t-shirt's claim of "Life's a Hustle in the D," I'd like to point out that I made two trips down one of the more scenic portions of Michigan Avenue in Detroit while I was home in Michigan a couple weeks ago, and I saw very little hustle out of the citizens of said area.)

I'll ignore obvious questions like, "Why steal and wave around a couple hundred bucks when, at least in Douglas' case, he was a couple years from making at least 100 times that much in the NFL?" and "Who looks at Adam "Pacman" Jones and says 'Yeah, that is a wise career path'"?

(Side Story 2: I implored Seattle Mariners outfielder Adam Jones to "make it rain" with a batting practice ball last night. I was mostly ignored.)

That brings us to college hockey. I can't help but feel that college hockey is lagging behind in these types of shenanigans. Sure, there have been moments; those UNO players in the casino, the BC guys getting busted for credit card fraud, Brandon Bochenski trying to print his own money. But for the most part, when it comes to scandals and Facebook embarassment, it's the same rote stuff. Jeff Frazee sipping Long Islands at Blarney's, Jonathan Toews poor form on the beer bong, yadda, yadda, yadda. Been there, done that.

That's why I'm calling for college hockey to start raising the bar a little bit. Most of the stars in college hockey have been drafted and are just a couple months away from signing that big contract. It's a perfect opportunity to get a little loose with the cash in the stupidest of possible fashions. Or I'm sure we'd all love it if a picture popped up on Facebook of a guy wearing a shirt that says, "Life's a Hustle in the E(dina)" I don't think it's too much to ask.

I don't think I'm asking too much here. It's a long offseason, and we need to be entertained.